Just few mins ago, I was invited to a Whatsapp group! In my surprise, it is the group of my cousins for my mom’s side. The ones that I’m closed to…or err…at least familiar.

Just a short brief, in case you’re interested :)). My dad born in Pekanbaru and my mom in Payakumbuh, and I told you here, we moved to capital city early in 1984. We barely did the home coming or pulang kampung not even during Lebaran (Eid Fitri) like thisMom once said, Amak (the way we called her mother a.k.a my grandmother) didn’t like the idea of her children visiting her house all at the same time. Like any other old Indonesian who were born in early 1900’s, she had 9 adult children (out of 12, mom said she had twin brothers who died at very early age). Too noisy for her, perhaps.

Btw, my dad only had 1 sister and I had 5 cousins from his side. His mother died at the very young age when my dad was only a little. My siblings and I are not familiar to our cousins from my dad’s side. We are more familiar to ones from my mom side.

Most of my mother’s siblings, if not all, still live in Sumatra, either in Pekanbaru, Duri or Payakumbuh. May be that explains why we are not really close to our cousins, except ones who continued their study in Jakarta, on which…only two of them or others who visited us in Jakarta every now and then.

This is a silly story. In 2000, when I did my internship in Duri, once I visited Pekanbaru (it’s a 2-hour-drive to have a good meal). My friends and I  stopped by in a restaurant and  greeted by the casher…in which, 45 minutes later I realized she is my cousin.  Years ago, I had business trip to Duri, I paid a visit to makdang (one of my mom’s older sister), just to update who is who, which is which, und so weiter. After all, ya masak jarang-jarang ke Sumatra ngga bela-belain mampir ke rumah saudara! 

If I am not mistaken, from mom’s side, I have 28 cousins, so my grandparents had 31 grandchildren. Well, even she barely did pulang kampung, mom regularly called her siblings, talked hours over phone then she would have us updated how her family was doing, who did what, bla bla bla…but then again, I barely met my cousins. And after she left, of course , I heard non about my relatives!

But yeah, everyone  is in Facebook nowadays, so are my relatives. I guess that’s where our silaturahmi takes place like it or not. If there was no FB, I probably wouldn’t have known that Uda Engga, (one of those 28 cousins) was participating in Tahura Trail Run. =)). It was the very first time my children met him and gave them a-family-tree-explanation.

To make it short, my second oldest cousin , Bang Dedi (man in blue with glasses) who also lives in Bintaro was doing annual home coming trip a.k.a mudik to Pekanbaru. His mom, my mother’s oldest sister still lives there. His wife sent this picture to the group. I figured they had day trip to Sumatra Barat.



I showed this picture to my daughter and she’s only familiar to  four people in that picture. Yeah, those 4 people live in Bintaro. No surprise.

I told her who is the fat lady on the left, bla bla…up until the old lady in Red. She’s surely not familiar with them. Later, I think, this is a homework to me. I should take double Ke to see their relatives. Hmmm….

NM is the initial of my grandparents name. Btw, who is in the same boat with me? Barely communicate  with the relatives.




3 thoughts on “Relatives

  1. For a second, I thought I was fluent in your language… but no, it’s just in English this time 😆

    I find the idea of very very large families both comforting and scary. Comforting i a way to know relatives can help and support in time of need, plus big gatherings can be fun. But scary too because you don’t necessarily have anything in common and family doesn’t mean friend.

    I have a fairly normal-size family for a Westerner I guess, and I’m very close to my closer relatives (parents, brother, sister, grand-parents, one aunt). I rarely see my extended family.

    • Ahahhahahahahha! well, it is not a common thing not to know your relatives I guess. Specially during Eid Fitri like this, Indonesian would have a BIG family gathering. But, like I said, since my family are physically away from our relatives, we are also emotionally apart.
      Well, since my parents are alone in Jakarta, they found themselves a new “family”.
      We are very close and I refer them as my auntie /cousins in this blog.
      but I do agree with you, during the hard time, like when my mom passed away, I got many help from them.

  2. gw juga ga banyak tahu 😀
    sekarang pun Lebaran ngumpul ya hanya sama keluarga sendiri aja Mba, sepupu ga banyak yang kenal hiks

    Happy Eid Mubarak Mba Kiky, angapo buku dikirim pakai JNE dari Bandung, belum dikirim sih hehe..nunggu buka dulu ya JNE nya

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